Hollywood/Harvey Weinstein ect....

Bulldogs,
Please don’t quote me and then add to what I said with words I didn’t say. Thanks.

 

I was thinking more of his daughter(not the one he married)accusing him of sexual assault, and the son(Ronan??) who seems to be an intelligent individual, backing up his sister even as an adult, so there is that...but like you said, Pupper, everybody just seems to have accepted his creepiness. Would you believe I won't watch his movies? It creeps me out way too much.

You're right Mel. At my last job, a male supervisor physically harassed me during the break of a company meeting. Other people saw it happen...nobody said a word. Luckily, I don't have a problem confronting idiots. I yelled at him.

 

I accidently sexually harassed two women at work. Through the company's internal email I emailed Jan, "I'm in desperate need of vast amounts of pleasure." An hour later her manager came into my office with a print-out of my email and laid it in front of me on my desk, and said, "Don't do this again, she doesn't like it." Then head of HR called me to his office to give me an official warning and inform me that the email was going in my file.

The second time happened when me and Tanisha were walking toward each other in a narrow hallway. I had my hands in the pockets of my longish fall coat. As she passed me by I flipped my pocketed hand back so the flap of the coat would slap her butt. It did. While still walking I turned around and smiled, but she'd stopped in her tracks and was glaring at me. Then I realized what I'd done. As she stared at me, I looked at her apologetically. I was so scared. After my first offense, she held my employment in her hands. And her expression let me know that she was well aware of that. She then turned and went on. She never told on me.

I'm too tired right now. I'll explain next time why I called these accidental.

 

The quote button actually doesn't do that.

You've accidentally responded to Mel within the quote code, hence it now looks as though Mel "agree’s 100% ^^^^" with herself.

To acknowledge this, all that is required of you is to look at your comment in question, which is entirely highlighted by the quote code.

 

correction:

 

::Can't stop laughing because my quotes have been utter PERFECTION::

(Hey, Mel, can I get an alias...I mean, if you just have extra, please do share?!)

 

To follow up on my previous post.

I did not mean the email to Jan in a sexual way. Anyone who knows me knows one of my pet peeves is guys who clog their talk with sexual double-meaning. It's a cheesy, low form of humor, and I've seen how tedious it is on women. In bars, the workplace, etc. When I wrote her that line it was late on a Friday after a hard work week and I was picturing a beachside resort type scene.

Secondly, Jan and I had a good relationship. We were always shooting each other casual emails. I didn't just email that to a coworker I barely knew.

I didn't find her the least bit attractive. In fact I'd place her in the sub zero numbers.

I surmise that the reason she turned on me is because of the joke I played on her about a week before. Her daughter would often bring Jan her lunch and park in the handicap space. As a little prank on her, I had the receptionist announce over the intercom "Would the owner of the blue VW please remove her car from the handicap space." Everyone knew it was her daughter's car. Jan didn't take this well, and she let me know just afterward.

It hit me hard to be thought of as someone who'd send that email in a sexual way. I just don't talk to women that way. I don't think in terms of sexual innuendo. I guess I've always been naive that way. But I realize a large part of the adult population does see things that way. After the manager put the email in front of me and I read, "I'm in desperate need of vast amounts of pleasure," I realized at once how the adult world would interpret it; that I was asking for a blowjob.

Weeks later as she noticed I wouldn't talk to her, she sent word to me that it wasn't her idea to tell on me, but rather her mean boss' idea, as the boss looked over her shoulder at her computer screen and saw what I'd written. Unlikely copout. I never talked to her again.

As for the Tanisha butt slap incident. We were really good office buddies. Often we'd stay after work in her office and just talk and laugh boisterously for an hour or so. Never touching on anything sexual, btw. She was not attractive to me. More like a fun aunt. Anyway, it's a simpler story than the previous. As she walked by me I didn't even think, and just out of spontaneous fun, slapped her butt with my coat flap. I'm so glad she ended up being cool about it.

But I do feel bad about the the butt slap (I don't feel bad about the Jan email, as I meant NOTHING sexual). But with Tanisha, yeah. Right after I'd slapped her, and saw her expression, rational adult understanding hit me like a brick, in the epiphany of, "yes she's your buddy, but she's also a woman, and you do NOT mess with a woman's butt. Especially in the office."

Immaturity has gotten me into a lot of trouble. I am working on it. Truly. I'm getting better. I don't spray my girlfriend in the face with the garden hose as she's peacefully reading a book anymore.

As a side point it's important to realize that as men, we are used to razzing and being casual with other guys. We grow up giving each other crap and laughing about it. It's a mistake to assume that women will take this sort of thing well. We have different mindsets. And sociologically/politically speaking, we often think of each other of being on opposing teams.

So just be mindful in the workplace. My job allowed me to see 6 different factories and offices each month. And believe me, women have to put of with a ton of bores and their stupid sexual innuendos. And it's the legacy of these stupid cheesy bores that got me in trouble in the first place. Yep, I'm still not over it.

 

I applaud your honesty, Pupper. Most people don’t have the guts. A thought that keeps occurring to me is, “what about the men?” I say this because of domestic violence rumors I’ve had to squash as a...direct result of having Meniere’s Disease! You read that right. I am 5’5”, petite. My husband is 6” and is built like a lumber jack. As many of you know, first responders do not usually know what they are dealing with if something happens to someone with Meniere’s Disease, and it’s Meniere’s related.

When I had my first drop attack I found myself lying on the floor with a nasty concussion and a very damaged arm. I was right next to the front door, as I’d been about to take my dog for a walk. Luckily, my husband was at home, he knew I shouldn’t be moved, etc, and we waited for the EMTs to take me to the hospital. During the doctor’s exam my husband was asked to leave the room, and I got those questions. I was ticked. For one thing, I have a firecracker personality when it comes to defending those I love, but I REALLY RESENTED the assumption that someone thought I would be in such a relationship just because I’m female, given that I’d already explained to the doctor exactly what happened!! Plus, my husband is a big teddy bear. He wouldn’t hurt a fly. I believe I erased all doubt, however, when I actually yelled at my husband in the hallway. I was displeased he didn’t get me back to the room fast enough after assisting me in the bathroom. ::chuckle:: Yes, I apologized later, when I came to my senses. That’s not like me at all. Turns out, anger can be a side-effect of concussions, and clearly it was for me. For my husband’s sake, however, I’m glad people witnessed hearing that, because that obviously doesn’t fit the domestic violence profile.

I became very concerned for him, once I started with the drop attacks. I made sure to let my family and friends know about the hospital incident, because God forbid something happened to me. I caught a glimpse of what my husband might have had to go through...it was surreal. It was like one of those Lifetime movies☹️

It’s not a popular topic of conversation, but men experience domestic violence, and sexual harassment/assault and false accusations of the above. The statistics are just grossly under reported.

 

I wouldn't consider women hounding me for sex as "horrific". Poor guy.

 

Autumn. Thanks for the compliment. What a bad thing for you and the drop attacks. I'd much rather stay home than go to an emergency room. Of course, I've never crumbled straight to the ground like you. The doctors have it rough too. They don't know their patients, and are obligated to ask awkward questions. I guess to them a patient's pride is secondary to determining whether the patient was abused.

Bulldogs. My comments were mostly about coworkers in the workplace.

I've never had a problem with the concept of "double standards". If two things are fundamentally different, as the genders are, then there's going to be different standards applied to them. I'd be guilty of hypocrisy in my previous comments only if I saw men and women as the same. I do not. Sue me.

 

That's just it, Pupper. What's okay for you isn't okay for someone else. It's about boundaries, and having those boundaries 1)established and 2)respected. It sounds like, based on the information provided by Bulldogs, that the couple he mentions make it apparent that they are married(clearly had boundaries) and uninterested in interference of any kind from outside parties. I'm guessing one or both of them wear rings, so traditional courtesy dictates the husband should automatically have been left alone, but as we all know, traditions aren't respected anymore. I don't know who I feel more sorry for, actually. The wife or her husband! Nobody deserves harassment of any kind, for any reason. We all have different perspectives. You're an unmarried male, so you have a different perspective from me, a married female. Believe me when I say, when poor married guys are hit on, it stresses the wives out, so the poor guy may in fact consider it, "horrific" at a certain point. He didn't ask for it.

Yeah, if I hadn't had to worry about a skull fracture, I wouldn't have gone to the hospital.

 

Rich athlete male get notes in his pocket soliciting sex. Groupies hang outside his dressing room letting him know if he wants some, they are ready and willing. Horiffic.



Woman is told if she doesn’t provide her boss with sexual pleasure she’s fired. Goes to HR. Nothing happens.

Man is told by a woman who has superiority over him in the office if he doesn’t pleasure her, he’s fired. Goes to HR. Nothing happens .

Person in a work room endures sexual innuendos, told can't take a joke continually , has their genitals grabbed, reports it and is told, get over it, that’s just how things are. You need the job, have no idea what to do. That’s horrific.

If none of you who are commenting here can identify with what it’s like to be traumatized by feeling helpless when you have been sexually assaulted or harassed, then please think before you comment.

Wondering how you can feed your kids if you kick the jerk in the nuts is a tad more worrisome than if some groupie left her phone number in your pocket. Smdh!!!