An analysis of said monologue. I like this part in particular; "There were times my mother flat-out said ‘No, you cannot rent that movie again, especially since you were afraid that sharks would come through the shower-head the other night'." *chuckles I can relate. My parents never dictated what movies I could or couldn't watch as a child. Which, in hindsight, was a problem considering my older sister constantly left the R-rated horror movies she adopted from her boyfriends either in the VCR or on the living room table. I would have been four or five when I first watched Jaws. I would have been four or five when I watched Joe Dante's Piranha, Richard Wenk's Vamp, Clive Barker's Hellraiser & Hellraiser III, & of course, Wes Craven's original Nightmare on Elm Street. Seemingly to twist this knife, I learnt how to operate the VCR merely days after returning home from months in hospital. Over a period of weeks while absent from kindergarten, through the mist of a nebuliser I exposed myself to all manner of vampires, serial killers & demons. All the while fresh, autobiographical memories of palpitation, greyout, & ultimately respiratory arrest rattled my adolescent psyche. I vividly remember myself as a child, the following summer, spending hours searching for sharks in my family's in-ground swimming pool, & monitoring the adjoining spa for piranhas. My reasoning at the time being; there's no way a large shark could fit in the spa. That's impossible. If there are sharks to be found, clearly they'll be in the pool. The smaller piranhas must congregate in the spa. Need I mention the fortnight or so that I avoided all hallways, due to the way A Nightmare on Elm Street's 'no running in the hallway' scene scorched itself into my developing limbic system. When my sister—who at the time was just like this gigantic cloud of bleached, totally backcombed hair, anchored to earth only by thin shreds of torn denim & the sheer weight of bangles—arrived home every Thursday or Friday night from what ever shady club accepted her fake ID, I wondered if she had inadvertently solved the Lament Configuration, or unknowingly spent the night galavanting around with vampires.